Break...

Too much has been happening (many unpleasant)... At the same time there are also many things held stagnant.

I'm truly tired. I need a break from it all... There is much to detest, but i just can't walk away and leave things hanging. Many friends always feel i'm super "happy-go-lucky" always got a smile planted on my face. Guess what? - I've never seen myself as that...

I miss "da-jie"... why did u have to go uproot urself and go to HK? Now all my emo-emo and nonsense stuff tell who?

Life is bleak now... until the light shines... when is tht going to happen...?

break...

So full...

Had company for breakfast this morning. Originally wanted to stay for Rosary prayer, but had a bugging headache (prob caused by tanning myself yesterday) so decided to give it a miss and ask if A wanted to have breakfast together. Embarrassingly, ended up talking about gigs and work for a short moment... oops... not so nice, but oh well... Thanks A for the offer to send me to the train station - but i declined cuz it was too early and i needed to walk a bit...

Had a sinful Blackforest iceblended yum yum before heading to my pupil's place for piano lesson. Headache didn't go away, but this pupil and the subsequent few who came to my place didn't make it worse. They are really good kids... :) really enjoy teaching the pupils that i currently have... God's Grace!

Just 2 things...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxD5nJ1yntg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32u7hgdqhEE

Argh... now i hear all the wrong notes... it didn't seem that bad then...
Still a number of places not in sync and well... as they all say: it could have been better.

Still, i think it was no easy feat. Cheers again...

Complaints galore... 201

I've never really been a big fan of complaints of any sort. I hate intimidating pple and I hate telling pple off... (surprise, surprise... like tht also can be teacher?) I'm not the confrontational sort and i totally stay away from it unless i simply have no choice but to face it... - so u can imagine how stressed i was feeling throughout the last 6 years of my life...

Actually, I hate complaining and whining mostly because what's done is done and well, if i hadn't done anything to resolve it earlier, why go back and complain abt it only after the event?

Transportation peeves -
Recently, i've had the opportunity to encounter free music while commuting - free music from teenagers handphones - yes, i know this is old news. - but it's only recently that I've really experienced and be truly irritated by such behaviour. One of a few instances: group of 4 or 5 boys sitting in the middle of 2 train carriages blasting music through a phone's speakers, no decency to keep the phone volume nor the volume of their conversation low. This is stated here as this was the most ultimate case. 1. What was all tht noise they were listening to? 2.If you want the whole train to hear ur music why the hell you talk so loudly? 3. If u want the whole train to hear ur conversation, why blast ur phone? 4. Since u are talking so loudly, u can't possibly be listening to ur "beloved" music, so why the HELL is it on ur phone's speakers in the 1st place?

Today... or rather yest afternoon, since it's now after midnight: On the way home frm lunch - caught a 1345 hr bus home. Chanced upon an uncle type of person looking sheepishly around him. After some time, i realised why he was doing it. He nicely treated the bus as his home... shoes removed, socks removed, airing feet... OMG... so comfortable eh? If only some lady wearing high heels had insisted on squeezing into the seat next to him and stepped on his foot! What a gracious society we're turning into.

Was reading an article the other day about handphones and teenagers... and how pple in Japan - though having phones much more hi-tech than those available in Singapore, are making less of a nuisance of themselves as compared to those "swakoo" type of SGreans who show off their "wonderful" and "hi-tech" ring tones and MP3 phones in public places - esp. public transportation. Own observation - one can eat and drink while commuting via public transport in Japan, there are no rules on the trains reminding them to get rid of the rubbish. They just do it automatically. No bits of unsightly rubbish in sight! Here, there are threats hung around... eat and drink, get fined... throw rubbish in inappropriate places, get fined...

Oh well, maybe this is the price to pay for having an economy that has grown and developed so much so that many pple don't realise what gracious living is, or what living is all about... it's become very much a me, myself and i type of living. I wouldn't deny there is significant number of pple who do care enough for gracious living and all that. However, not enough pple realise that ultimately - No Man is an Island. We need to realise that we are a community not individuals. Anything you do or don't do WILL (fortunately or unfortunately) affect others around you.

I rest my case.

That aside, I'm glad that now there're electronic signboards at certain bus-stops showing the waiting time for the arrival of the next bus.

On the 200th post...

Wanted to plant several grouses... but it being the 200th post - no i'm not superstitious or anything of that sort - I'd like very much to just state for the record that I'm really thankful for
everyone that have been part of my life - the relationships with family, relatives, friends...
the many experiences that i've gone through - i truly learnt a lot from them be it a failed relationship, a new job, a "revelation", good or bad...
the ability to love and to forgive...
the gift to teach... (didn't occur that teaching was a gift till quite recently)
the ability to trust God... (still have problems doing this at times, but for the numerous times i manage to do so, i'm really thankful)

To round up, i thank God for giving me my family, friends and experiences that show me how much love there is around us, and how much more love we can give.

I'll stop being mushy at this point.

The only pple who end up getting hurt...

Just to drop a thought of the day (or rather of the night) since i only just thought of this...

When we immerse ourselves in bad habits - drinking, gambling, smoking, just lazing and not taking care of our own health, popping pills, the list goes on... - the pple we ultimately hurt are the ones whom we really love and the ones who love us. Perhaps, then, if we continue with our habits, we have not really thought what love involves and what it actually means... to ourselves and to our loved ones.

Reason for thought: friend's dad passed away... internal bleeding resulting frm a stroke and history of health complications.

I found IT!

Walked into TSVideo today... found Nodame Cantabile on the shelves... bought it! This is SOOOO terrible... at a time my finances are so much less stable... I'm buying stuff like nobody's business... Am going to grab 2 other things very soon - Secret and an interesting top i saw today.

Cooking and washing are soooo wrong to do now... almost re-break the same nail i broke 2 days ago... how smart... all because i removed my plaster before cutting and cooking... wat an ass...

I wonder wat bad things will happen next... sheesh.

A 3rd resignation... (2nd installation)

It would have been too obvious if I'd dumped this here immediately after the "event". So here it is...

I missed out on the "usual" stuff that day as there was something else i had to attend. So everything that I knew about the situation was from the "usual suspects" and Complainer. Let's shorten tht to C.

Obviously, C was there together with the jin gang. I wasn't. I was somewhere through one of my puzzle games tht night when an MSN msg came in...C immediately went on to describe the messiness of the situation and how some pple do not have the sense to behave sensibly in any situation. I really had nothing to say... cuz i'm in no position to do anything. and... unfortunately ALL i could think off was - just leave it lah... everybody don't want to care, pretend not to care or whatever... I don't really wanna care either o/w become my responsibility. Besides, the sudden influx of the uninitiated doesn't really help situation as it is... especially since the initiated refuse to do anything about it or were never in the position to act on it anyways. So bottomline - not really anybody's fault... and definitely nobody's responsibility?

I'm sick and tired of the situation... totally... i refused to be pulled into it...

My thumb's not tht great, am now risking it's survival by prac-ing Debussy... i miss being able to prac Chopin and Bach... but i think i better stay off these 2 now... before i really kill it. Besides, tht ass of an ache on my Left hand, palm and 5th finger area seems to be acting up again... i wonder if there was ever a time the ache wasn't there...

So terribly proned...

The day before my lunchtime concert performance, i got a lovely, long paper-cut on my finger. The day itself, I rewarded myself with yet another cut on yet another finger. The day after, accidentally cut myself while slicing cucumbers to make pickled cucumber.

Just when i thought i could try and settle Debussy during these coming weeks before my next piano lesson, i've lost the use of my right thumb for @ least a week. Somehow managed to break the nail - probably assisted by the earlier damage a tiny piece of eggshell did to tht same thumb. All i did was to place my phone back into it's cradle!

I'm so irritated... with myself... so careless...